How to Ask for a Hookup without Looking Stupid
Hookups are some of the most exciting forms of romantic interaction that you can have with another person. The only downside is that you can make yourself look utterly stupid if you approach the topic the wrong way. You don’t want to be known as the weirdo that has scared off all these women because you get tongue-tied about the topic of sex. Fortunately, you can follow a few guidelines and learn how to ask a woman for a hookup without looking weird.
Be confident while looking for local hookups
Confidence is king in all things, from employment to social interactions. It should be no surprise that the most important mindset to maintain while you’re dating is one of confidence. Some people are genuinely confident when they are trying to hook up with women. Those types of guys can walk into any bar and start chatting with ladies, and they’ll naturally attract them, too. By the end of the night, a confident guy can get a hookup with just a little effort and a cocky smile that makes women want them. Still, other men need a little boost in confidence before getting positive results. You have two options if you’re looking for local hookups:
- fake it until you make it;
- utilize a better hookup method than bar room dating.
The former concept is exceptional if you can psych yourself up and believe in yourself. Otherwise, you need a less direct way of asking women to hook up, like using an online dating site. Going on one of these dating services is the key to finding a local hookup for people who aren’t good at the face-to-face aspect of asking women for hookups. Dating websites basically make the entire situation easier because you will be:
- using a site for local women;
- the women on that site will be ready for hookups;
- you can’t fake your confidence online until you feel it;
- rejections won’t wreck your confidence because you’re not face-to-face.
For all these reasons and more, going digital can be just the thing you need to make local hookups happen between you and a woman. Just remember that you need to use a good website and a VPN to give you access to the best resources without leaving any personal data on the net.
Nothing is impossible, don’t make it difficult for yourself
Another thing that every man needs when looking for a hookup is the correct perspective. Too many guys start looking for hookups and stop quickly because they think that their failure equals impossibility. You have to realize that not every woman is looking for hookups. Even the most charming man is going to fail because some women need to be in a relationship to sleep with someone. At best, one study showed that about 39% of women had tried to hook up with someone throughout their lives, and the majority of them did so five times or less throughout their lives. The odds are not in your favor if you go out and try to find random hookups.
The best way to overcome the feeling that hookups are hard or impossible to find is to use technology to even the odds. We have already expounded on the benefits of using dating websites for hookups, and that idea crops up here once again. When you log into a local hookup website for the first time, you’ll see that there are thousands of women online and in the mood. That vastly improves your chances because 100% of the women on the site want some form of casual dating. Even if a quarter of them are attracted to you and live close by, you can still find tons of meaningful partners. Remember that getting an edge by using dating services is the best way to cut down on negative feelings about the potential of hooking up.
Don’t look too thirsty
A major problem men face when trying to hook up with an attractive woman is that they come on too strong. In many ways, women are different than men. They know what they want, but they enjoy the “dance” that gets them to say yes. So, what does a woman expect from a man who wants hookups?
- Don’t show too much interest in her. You can’t make her the center of your universe, or she’ll feel that she’s won, and the game is over.
- Strike up a conversation, and let it trail into something flirty.
- Let her know she’s attractive; buy her a drink or comment on her picture online.
- If things start to cool off, let them.
Guys who play it cool are the ones that end up with hookups. The men who relentlessly pursue women are the ones that end up seeming too clingy for a fun night. How you play it cool is up to you, but be a little distant, don’t let them know everything about you, and don’t be a sounding board for all their problems. Let them know you’re out for a good time and that you’re perfectly alright with your own company.
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Girls need it as much as you do
The last thing you need to realize is that women want sex just as much as men. A lot of women are programmed by society from a young age to be more conservative with their sexual feelings and to practically never express them to other people. That is why women will make the man coax them with sweet words or a few drinks to separate the “real” them from the one that is having fun.
Again, if you go out to a club, you can certainly find women in need of a good time. If you use an online dating service, you’ll find women who are more comfortable pursuing hookups because they’re online and better able to express themselves without feeling foolish. The simple realization that girls want sex just as much as men should give you confidence, and you can turn that into a successful hookup.
Nothing is worse than putting yourself out there for a hookup and looking dumb for all your efforts. Fortunately, you can approach hookups with the knowledge that women want hookups and that some ways are more effective at finding them, and that can be the difference between an empty bed and a good time. Take what we’ve shown you here, and go forth to have wonderful hookups with beautiful women!
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